Choosing to accept what we have

We pull open the glass doors and are greeted by a blast of cool air. There is a wonderful lack of humidity in the building.  we walk along the white hallway, the carpeted floor softening our steps. We find the correct room, and enter. Several people are standing around chatting. Thoughts like

 i don't know anyone here.

 i don't want to be here.

 All i wanted was to go to a basketball game.

are running through my head. I sit down in the second row from the front, clutching my army-green backpack. Eventually everyone takes their seats, and they begin. People glance around them as a few more straggle in. I try to listen to what the people are saying, but more of my thoughts keep flooding in. I try to push them aside, but I'm only partially successful.

The people at the front continue to talk, and my mind weakens a little as they tell us about their experiences. I must admit, i did find it interesting, but to be honest, i didn't want to be interested. I wanted to rebel.
 


They ended it, and began praying. All i wanted was to get out of there, but i was angry with myself for thinking that. I wanted to want to stay there and participate, if that makes sense, but i still did not want to. I felt apathetic and i hated it. i knew i should feel differently about this whole scenario, but i didn't.

What i realize now is, that if we rebel, and do not accept what we have and choose to make the best of it, then our mind will not let us enjoy the time we are given. These people just sacrificed a huge portion of their lives to help other people, and i was begrudging them two hours of my time. I wasn't letting go of my wish to be at another place. I knew i was wrong, but i did not stop myself. Now i realize that that's the way we would constantly be without Christ. And now I'm thankful more than ever that we don't have to always be like that. Thankfully, we can change.